On Kangaroos & Klums: Heidi, That Is.

Listen, I'm going to be honest.

Despite my capital L love for Tim Gunn, I haven't watched Project Runway since it moved to Lifetime.    I know I'm in one half of the show's target demographic- straight girls who love gay men- and am a staunch lover of their other demographic- gay men.

I just couldn't get behind the move to a different network.  Bravo is all about being (or thinking) you're young.  It's flashy.  It's fun.  It's sassy.  It's tragic in that over the top "Should-I-wear-an-Ice-Capades-outfit-to-the-club?  OMG! No-you-shouldn't-because-I-would-have-to-change" way.

Lifetime is just tragic, like sad tragic.  As in "I-don't-know-if-I-can-put-on-clothes-today-but-I've been-wearing-this-outfit-and haven't-taken-a-shower-in-a-week.  Ok-two-weeks" way.

But I digress.

Yesterday, I was walking to meet a friend for dinner who did I happen to see on the side of a bus but HK.  It's the latest advert for the new season of Project Runway and it looks a little something like this:

That's a tall drink of, well, not exactly water...

HK has a diamond for a nipple.  I can never compete.

My first thought was: Why is HK in her underwear on the side of the bus?

My second: Wait, has the show become so gimmicky that it's a full season of underwear designs.  Tragic...Lifetime tragic.

My third: Oh, right.  Now that HK isn't married to Seal and perpetually knocked-up like a kangaroo, I guess that makes it ok to be in you underwear on the side of a bus.  Way to stick it to Seal.  Their children must be so proud.  

My fourth (this morning as I was looking for the picture on the internet): this blog has an excellent point- HK does look like she's going to chop off a nipple.

My fifth:  I must do more research on Kangaroos.  They will be our overloards one day.  Seriously, people.  Three different lady-bits chambers for babies.  We are doomed as a species.

Power to the Topless!

Activists have been known to do some crazy things: throw blood-flavored paint (or flour, if you’re Kim Kardashian) on to fur-wearing celebrities; chain themselves to machinery, vegetation, or even each other in protest of any number of (what they perceive as) wrongdoings; and even sometimes going so far as to destroy property and/or take lives in an effort to get their points across.  

One of the less aggressive, yet certainly no less effective, methods of protest is currently being employed by Philadelphian activist, Moira Johnston, and requires that the protestor appear au naturel. Yes, in her power-to-the-people moment, Ms. Johnston has been seen strolling down the streets of New York, topless. And she does it selflessly, for all womankind. 

  Notice how none of the passersby pay her one iota of attention. Only in New York...  

What cause is she championing by walking around topless, you ask? Why, a woman’s right to walk around topless, of course.

Duh.

Apparently Moira thinks it’s really important for all of us to know that in New York it’s legal for a woman to be topless anywhere a man can be. It’s an interesting fact and I’m glad to learn it—not that I ever intend to put it into practice—but surely there are more important causes she could be championing. After all, when women were burning their bras and marching on Washington, demanding social and economic equality with men, I would imagine that a woman’s right to go topless was fairly far down on their list—somewhere after, you know, job equality and the right to vote.

But I could be wrong.

Yet, although her cause might be slightly questionable, it’s undeniable that Ms. Johnston provides a fantastic tourist attraction for the Big Apple, and has been spotted posing for pictures with curious onlookers. (You think that pic goes in the scrapbook with the rest of the vacation shots, somewhere between the pictures of the Statue of Liberty and the Empire State Building?) To this I say, the Naked Cowboy better watch his back; if he’s not careful he may soon be out of a job.

Or maybe they could collaborate.

Ah, yes, I can see it now...

The Topless Twosome, coming to a street corner near you!